Relatives come in all shapes, sizes... and quirks! They've been in your
life forever, adding different colours and flavours. Some annoying, some
hilarious and some real cool, your extended family plays a big part making you
the crazy one you are today. Here's an ode to the different types of relative
we all have:
1. The annoying kid
"Bhaiyya laptop nahi de rahe!"
Remember the one that asked for your favorite GI Joe while your parents are
looking, so you can't say no, and then break the head off right in front
of your eyes. The little devil!
2. The love bird
"Bahar jao. Mera phone aaya hai."
We all have that one bhaiyya/didi who's always on the phone talking to 'jaanu';
full on mush.
3. The super cool one
"Arre pi lo. Sabko main sambhal loonga."
Could be your 'bhabhi'. Or your 'mama'. Or your dad. The
coolest one in the family. Always fun to hang out with. He's the one you can
introduce your girlfriend to. He'll get you all the permissions. Seek him out
when you want to chill.
4. The gadget guru
"iPod Touch hai bete!"
Those with all the new cool gizmos. They're the ones who introduced you to
iPod and portable game consoles when you were little.
5. The curious chachi
"Batao Batao ! Gharwalon se kya sharam?"
She's the nosy one. Always curious about your marks, salary, friend's
salary, relationship status. In short, really intrusive.
6. The gullible grandparents
"Achha! Computer se roti bhi ban jaati hai?"
The one you love to fool. They'll believe anything you say. And you take
advantage of that. But you love them. *Aww* right?
7. The shaitaans
"Suna hai bachpan mein hawaai chappal khate the tum."
The pranksters. The trolls of the family. They enter a family gathering, and
turn it into a laughter riot. It's fun when you team up with them, but not when
they pull your leg. Just like that they let out your most embarrassing secrets.
8. The complaining bua
"Kal ashleel film dekh raha tha ye theater mein!"
She'll complain about everything. 'He drives the bike too fast'. 'I saw him
with a girl that day'. Basically, the truth. But still!
9. The drinking partner
"Waise to mai nahi peeta, lekin aap insist kar rahe hain
to..."
Distant relatives, or brothers-in-law. You can drink with them, and not
worry about anyone knowing. They need you like you need them. Symbiosis!
10. The matchmaker
"Ek Bohut achha rishta aaya hai. Ladka straight hai."
They're always fixing you up with someone. They don't care who. They just
want to be the ones who got you married. Because punya.
11. The sanskari one
"Utho, utho! Aaj hum sab mandir jaayenge."
For them, praying is the solution to everything. They can suggest a 'hawan'
for any problem you have.
12. The giver
"Arey nahi beta. Lena toh
padega!"
The one who shells out cash, every time you meet them. Then you do that
little non-sense ritual act of I-can-not-take-the-money before finally
pocketing it happily!
13. The competitors
"Bas 42? Hahaha! Hamare paas toh 420 inch ka TV hai!"
No matter what you have, they have a better version. And they'll make sure
you hear it. Every single time!
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